23rd of January

Hi Everyone,

Been to Weston Park today to get the mask made that I need for my Radiotherapy, this is so that the parts of my face and neck that dont have cancer are protected plus it will keep my head still through out the treatment, the image below is an image of a mask like the one I've had made today. To be totally honest I was a little frightened but I knew it need to be made, anyway I laid on a bed and the sheet that the mask is made out of was placed in warm water to make it soft it was then placed on my face, 3 nurses pushed it against my face and shoulders to make it a tight fit, it was locked in place and  cold water was put on to mask while on my face to make it go hard, the nurses then took the mask off and run it under cold water I could then get dried and dressed again.

We then went in to the waiting room because the next step was to go and have a CT scan with the mask on so my care could be planned out, while we where waiting I was given all the dates and times of my treatment.

We were called into CT scan area, I was asked to lay on the scan table a cannula was inserted into my arm so an ink could run through my blood while I was been scanned, this is all so every time Im blasted with radiotherapy its hit the right spot AMAZING, SCARY, BUT AMAZING.

This time when the mask was locked into place over my face it was really tight and it did feel uncomfortable the nurses removed it and we tried moving my chin slightly until I felt better, it was very tight and I think to be honest it's the fact that I was locked in and couldn't move that was unnatural which was the most frightening thing, once it had been on for a few minutes I was ok, it's not nice but I kept saying to myself  "Ive 7 weeks of this and I need to get use to it, because this is the only way I'm going to get better" this helped me to relax.

The scan happened and the nurses kept coming in and out marking the mask all the way through they kept talking to me and reassuring me.

It might be scary but IM LUCKY.

When it was all over I had to sit in a room to make sure I was ok for a while. While we were waiting for the remover of the cannula, Alison the research nurse, this is the nurse that will look after me while Im part of the trial came to meet me she wanted me to meet her before I started the trial so nothing was scary. When I was clear to go Alison took us to the floor where I needed to go on the w/c 6th she explained everything that is going to happen and that she will be with me at all times through out the week, Im really excited about this part of the whole treatment.

When I got home a beautiful bouquet of flowers where delivered with beautiful kind words from one of my lovely friends I am so lucky.

Tomorrow is a day of rest hopefully the mouth will stop hurting and then Wednesday is Doncaster hospital PEG being fitted.

Love to you
Night Night xxxxxxxxx